If only Black Friday were a bit darker…

I feel hungover.

I have a major, major headache. My voice is raspy. I have a pretty bad cough. My lymph nodes are very swollen.

Worst of all? I have to work today.

Well, I’m not hungover. At least not from alcohol. (Though we did pick up The Hangover at Wal-mart for $1.67. We think something was amiss with the registers, though the number was in-line with their odd pricing system.)  The Hubs and I hit up some of the major retailers late last night. And I’m sick.

Lovely.

We went a little overboard, admittedly. If you asked me at the start of the day yesterday, I had one thing to buy.

18 shopping bags later…

Just kidding. More like several large boxes and probably 6 large shopping bags.

The good part of the experience was that I had fun with the Hubs and we kept reeeeeally good attitudes. There was even skipping and bopping around to the “Turkey Dance Song,” which was the theme for this year’s Thanksgiving, however the Hubs quickly tired of that song and started changing the words to have the turkey be deep-fried. Accurate, but wrong. So very wrong.

Each of the major retailers we went to together earned an award. Some good. Some awful.

Walmart–Best Place if You Want to Experience Disorganization, Mayhem, and Possibly a Mob.

  • People tore into the sale stuff early and apparently the police were involved.
  • You could not WALK through this store.
  • There were several babies screaming. I don’t blame them. Some were itty bitty and were an afterthought to the parents wanting new storage containers.
  • I misplaced my husband. I didn’t have my cell phone. (My bad.)

Target–Smoothest Process and BEST Organization Award.

  • I will sing this store’s praises for a long time to come. Everything was smooth sailing and efficient.

Kohls–LONGEST “Express” Line EVER.

  • I appreciated the gimmick of signing up for a Kohl’s Card and getting to check out back in Customer Service instead of in the line that wrapped around the store, which we did, but that line still took quite a while. It saved us at least an hour though. I wish Kohl’s would learn they need to invest in those temporary registers or something because those lines are out. of. control.
  • They get some points for having a good supply of everything. There was a monstera leaf tropical, super soft blanket I eyed while we were waiting to go in Target and they actually had it. They had stashes of the blankets all over the store and one of my fellow shoppers who we chatted with briefly came running back with the one we were looking for.
  • We got 20% off for opening a Kohl’s card, $15 per $50 spent in Kohl’s cash, $10 off for opening a Kohl’s card + we had a coupon for $10 off. Holy multiple discounts, Batman!

I skipped JoAnn’s for $1.49/yd flannel. Because we left Kohl’s at 2 and I got to bed at 3.

Sooo, little known fact: Sleep deprivation is actually a periodic treatment used in Psychotherapy. When I worked for an outpatient Psychiatric practice, it was used to give a temporary “high” and therefore, an anti-depressant quality.

Um, sure. So Black Friday is retail therapy and psychotherapy, though as we found, it can also cause the need for psychotherapy and it might also result in an arrest, as found with the woman at Walmart (of course), who was using pepper spray to take out her competition.

In the meantime, I need more of this:

About agoodlifeforme

I am... a wife (married 3 years to "Hubs"). a momma to an energetic, feisty, smiley "Little" toddler. working full-time, currently using a Psychology degree as a coaster. lifelong never-been-published writer about to subject myself to the query letter twilight zone. addicted to caffeine in the mornings. most myself when I'm creating something. serial multi-tasker. always planning something. in love with the ocean, but live in a land-locked state. starting our own organic vegetable garden after always killing every plant that has been put in my care. learning to sew and hoping I don't stitch through my fingers. stubborn, kind, selective in the company I keep. at a healthy weight. I lost 74 pounds using totally healthy methods. I'm over 100 pounds lighter than I was when Little was born. a runner-in-training.
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